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Tator Nuts

~*Michael Kelso*~
Kelso is a himbo, a male bimbo. He is goofy and dopey. Kelso is also energetic and charismatic.  He is naive and slow in the thinking department. His girlfriend Jackie has him totally whipped. He cheated on Jackie with multiple women, the most notorious was Eric's sister Laurie. He has even hit on Donna on more than one occasion. Kelso is, as Donna would say, a skeavy pig. He's "man-pretty" and he knows it. He has done modeling for a department store. He idolizes John Travolta's character from "Saturday Night Fever". He has proven that he does have some grey matter,  by  making smaller paddles for the Atari game Pong. Kelso's dream is to be a spaceman. To paraphrase Bowie, "Ground control to Major Idiot".

Kooky McShrimplover

~*Donna Pinciotti*~
Donna is the girl-next-door tomboy. She occasionally proves that she's not "just one of the guys", she can also be sexy and "brickhouse". She is strong-willed, level-headed, intelligent, and independent. Donna has been friends with Eric since they were kids and they began dating when she was 17. Eric gave Donna a promise ring, which resulted in their breakup. The promise ring meant "forever", which freaked her out. She wasn't ready for a serious commitment. They have remained friends, which has been awkward. She has been dating Kelso's older brother Casey, who has proven himself to be a jerk. Donna puts up with his crap.  Donna has a feminist "take no crap" attitude, which contradicts with the girly, ditsy way she acts around dreamy guys like Casey. Both her parents are idiots. Her mom left and moved to California and she really misses her. Donna is a writer and has published stories in the school paper. She works at a rock radio station doing the farm report. She aspires to become a rock n roll journalist or the President. 


~*Eric Forman*~ 
Eric is the central character of the show. Situations usually revolve around him, and his friends congregate to his basement. Eric is a very realistic character, he has flaws, like he's a bit insecure. Eric is skinny and handsome, though he's not "man-pretty" like Kelso. He is adorable, which describes his looks and personality. He is a good friend and was a good boyfriend to Donna. Eric broke up with Donna because he wanted a long-term commitment and she wasn't sure what she wanted. I believe that his relationship with Donna has made him a stronger person. He is less insecure and stands up for himself. He is enjoying single life as "Point Place's Most Eligible Viking", but he still longs for his true love Donna. I predict that these two will get back together. If they don't, I will boycott the show - just kidding. Eric worked at Fatso Burger and is currently a Pricemart stock boy, where he works with his father. His father Red is very strict with him and can scare him. He has a good relationship with his mother Kitty, which he didn't have with his sister Laurie. I miss their sibling back-stabbing and banter. Eric's sanctity is the basement (his "bat cave"), and his car, the Vista Cruiser. I love Eric's deadpan delivery and facial expressions. His face is very expressive, you can read his thoughts and emotions like they're written on his forehead.


~*Bob Pinciotti*~ 
Bob is Donna's father. He is really bald and wears an awful fro toupee. He thinks he's stylin' with his afro and hideous, yet trendy clothes. Bob is cheerful and upbeat. He is also corny and a big dork. His attitude is an annoyance to his neighbor Red. Bob had his own appliance store called Bargain Bob's. The store went out of business because it couldn't compete with Pricemart. His wife Midge left him and he can't understand why since "I Did all the right things. We had an open marriage, experimented with drugs. I even threw nudist parties". Bob is currently dating Joanne, a woman he met at the supermarket. Joanne isn't anything like airhead Midge. She's strong, outspoken, and has something Midge doesn't have, a brain.

The Devil

~*Laurie Forman (1999-2001)*~ 
Laurie is evil personified. She is ultra promiscuous. She flunked out of college and moved back home. She was a slacker for awhile, then took up beauty school. Laurie is no longer on the show. When we last saw Laurie she was doing poorly in beauty school. I predict, if Laurie were still around, she would've flunked out of beauty school. *Cue "Beauty School Drop Out" from "Grease"*She acts innocent around her parents. Laurie is a daddy's girl and really plays up that image. Her mom doesn't buy her act,  though her father does. Perhaps he's in denial and doesn't want to believe his sweet little angel is the devil. She doesn't have the best relationship with her brother. She tortures Eric by insulting, embarrassing , and revealing information to their parents that Eric doesn't want them to know. Laurie used Kelso as a boy-toy. She dated Kelso while he was still dating Jackie. She made sure that Kelso would get busted, and kissed him in front of Jackie. This resulted in Kelso and Jackie's temporary breakup.

The Hippie

~*Leo (1999-)*~ 
Leo is the ultimate stoner and hippie. The 2 most popular words in his vocabulary are "man" and "dude". Leo is the incompetent boss of the Fotohut, which employs Hyde. Leo and Hyde are friends. They have an interesting relationship. Even though Leo is much older than Hyde, Hyde is more mature and responsible. He once asked Hyde to be his dad. Leo pops up out of nowhere to join the gang. He often tags along on their misguided adventures, like road tripping to Canada for beer.

Mrs. Grinch

~*Kitty Forman*~
Kitty is the ideal mother. She's cheerful, caring, and nurturing. She is concerned and involved with her family, Eric's friends, and the Pinciottis. Kitty is motherly to all of Eric's friends. The gang often seeks advice from her. She is the voice of reason. She took in Hyde when his mother abandoned him and treats him like her own. Kitty is a peacemaker, she wants everyone to be happy. She is a nurse. She temporarily put work on hold to take better care of Eric and Hyde. She see's through Laurie's good girl act. I think Eric is her favorite, she babies him. When Kitty gets stressed she smokes cigarettes and bakes. She has a great laugh, which is her trademark. Her laugh not only comes out when she's happy, but when she's uncomfortable and to break the silence.

Johnny Table

Fez is a Point Place High foreign exchange student. Fez is not his real name, Fez stands for Foreign Exchange Student. Both his name and what country he is from are mysteries. This has been a running gag on the show. Fez lives with his "bible thumping host parents" the Erdmans. He spends much of his time in Eric's basement to escape from his host parents. Fez is unique, quirky, and flamboyant. He learns American customs from his friends. His favorite American word is "whore", though he doesn't really know what it means. Fez is a talented disco dancer, he can even roller disco. He's a great singer too, he sang to Jackie in an attempt to seduce her. Fez is romantic and sweet. He gets taken advantage of because he is naive and kind hearted.  Fez had a major crush on Jackie, which he is apparently over now. He dated Caroline, but she turned out to be a psycho and a stalker. He has a love for candy. His lady love is currently the dorky Big Rhonda. Fez often complains about being a virgin. Could Big Rhonda be the one to make him a man?


~*Midge Pinciotti (1998-2001)*~ 
Midge has a brain deficiency disorder. She's a complete bubble head. Midge was an unhappy housewife. She tried to achieve happiness by partaking in many '70s fads and trends. She did yoga, smoked pot, was a swinger, took up feminism and participated in a female empowerment class. She gave her daughter Donna idiotic advice. It's a miracle that Donna turned out so level-headed and intelligent with Bob and Midge for parents. Midge and Bob had a problematic marriage. She wasn't happy. She left him and moved to California to become "a star on Broadway".

Curley Q

~*Steven Hyde*~ 
Hyde is rebellious, anti-conformist, and a conspiracy theorist. He hates "the fuzz" and "the man". He usually has a mellow, zen attitude, except when he's expressing his theories or participating in a wicked burn. Hyde has been abandoned twice, and has been living with the Formans. Red and Kitty treat him like a son. Red actually treats Hyde better than his own son Eric. Hyde has been with plenty of Point Place chicks, but they have all been flings. He hasn't been in a serious relationship. Hyde tried to put the moves on Donna, but it didn't lead to anything. What bugs me about Hyde is how he gets off on seeing his friends get burned. He even conspires to burn them. What kind of friend is that? Hyde can be a sarcastic ass, but he does have a soft side, which he doesn't show often. He has his badass image to protect.

Mr. Formanelli

~*Red Forman*~ 
Red is a major hard-ass. His vocabulary is sprinkled with the word "ass". After high school he joined the army. He fought in World War II. He is a proud veteran. He was the manager of an auto-parts plant for about 20 years, until the plant closed. Red was unemployed for awhile. Bob offered him a job as a salesman at Bargain Bob's, which he reluctantly took because of his pride. His time at Bargain Bob's was brief. Red applied for a manager's position at Pricemart. He was offered a cashier's position, but he was able to fight his way into the manager job. Red works with his son Eric, who is a stockboy. Red is very strict with Eric and verbally abuses him, he feels it will make Eric a man. Red favored Laurie, and acted unaware that his daughter was slutty and evil. Red is occasionally affectionate and sweet, especially with Kitty. Though he doesn't show it often, Red is a big softie.

Little Red Riding Bitch

~*Jackie Beulah Burkhardt*~ 
Jackie is a perky cheerleader. She is very feminine and is into girly things like shopping, clothes, makeup, and unicorns. Jackie thinks very highly of herself, in other words, she's conceited and vain. She is rich, spoiled, bossy, and has to get her way. She is a grade below the rest of the gang. She initially got into the gang by association because she was dating Kelso. She has Kelso "whipped like the family pig". She is constantly whining "Michael!". She puts up with Kelso and his cheating ways. Jackie had a crush on Hyde. She was infatuated with him and pretty much stalked him. She admired his zen attitude. She bought pot to impress him and was busted by the cops. Hyde stepped in and took the blame. Hyde, in Jackie's eyes, was her knight in shinning armor. Hyde gave in and took Jackie out on a date, but when they kissed there wasn't any chemistry, so it didn't work out. Jackie has matured lately. She got a job at the Cheese Palace when her father told her he would cut of her allowance if she continued to date Kelso. She chose Kelso over money. Jackie refused to give Kelso a cent of her hard earned money. She also got upset with Kelso for modeling, which is her dream.